Thursday, January 3, 2013

We the people




So, I wake up another morning, signed in my Facebook account and then yet another article pops on my wall. This time it headlined “Damini’s last words to her mom”.
I clicked it open. The post expectedly started on a sentimental note and then went into the explicit details of that horrific incident.  A picture of a girl too (which later I found it to be fake) was attested along with the article not to mention the name of the Facebook page in bold letters that was sharing it. The worst part was the ending where the page asked its readers to like/share it stating that 1 Like= I Tear and I share=1 phaasi (capital punishment) for the culprit. “Thoko Like bhaiyon” was the caption with which the article ended.
This incident compelled me to write this article which probably is the first serious post I have ever tried to write. Again, all the views mentioned in this are restricted to my understanding and I have no intention to hurt any sentiments. Serious apology if something like that happens.
First of all, we all know that the girl eventually died. Sad but do you think that sharing every intrinsic detail is genuinely necessitated. If 6 people raped her body in a bus was not enough, millions other continue to rape her soul in every nook and cranny of the country.  And Damini? Seriously? In movie Damini, the main character Damini fought for a rape victim and did her bit to ensure justice to that girl. How come that is related to this girl who was raped and murdered?People” are turning her into a heroine, a martyr, a role model who sacrificed. By people I basically mean Media and many web pages in Social networking sites.  Why are they doing this? The simple answer is the common people, me you and everyone love reading it. The same way we love unhealthy entertainment and movies which objectifies women. That news channels and pages just en cash that. Just remember guys, even this girl gets the desired justice, the purpose is still not served.  Even a rape with less brutality needs to be dealt with equal severity.
So who is responsible, pin pointing is easy, start with government.
When I read the remarks and statements of some high profile minsters and police commissioners, that includes some powerful well educated women as well; I personally feel that they are incapable of solving the present criticality. And the way government has handled till now, well, I am least impressed to say the least. Closing down the metro stations was one act of cowardice. Poor conviction rate of rapist just corroborates the other aspect. 
In short,

Dear Manmohan Singh

Ghanta theek hai

Yours sincerely,  
Rest of India                                                                                                                                                            


But then, the whole point boils upon one specific question, who have elected them? None other than “We the people”. But really did every one of us? To be frank, not actually. Many, even the best educated class don’t vote either because of utter laziness or because of a common myth that just one vote of mine won’t affect the result. Voting ranks last in their priority list. No surprise, only around half of the population vote. So here comes the first problem. The very US instead of doing anything constructive just re-read and re-sympathize and re-share the same post and feels content that they have played their part. I am not against this re sharing play but must say that this act of empathy is not sufficient at all.  I have seen many changing their profile picture to a black dot condemning the act and evincing their anger, frustration, fear etc. Agreed that this is like doing your BIT but trust me, on a macroscopic level, this is actually just a BIT. Dead assured, not many of them even have a voter ID card. Those who have, they just use it for verification of their IRCTC tickets while travelling. Even you had one and you have voted before also, did you ever reconsider whom you are going to vote. Thousands of times you discussed why FDI in retail, ever once you debated why to prefer one political party over another. Least, if you don’t vote at all, better stop your hue and cry regarding governance. That just looks plain fake. Be assured, your Black dot and multiple shares won’t save the next target alone. Voting is the easiest and the best way to bring upon the much needed change. Don’t hope that with time, things will change. Remember, Doing thing changes things. Not doing anything will keep the things the way they are no matter what the time is.
The other problem which I fear is our attitude. This incident is in top notch news these days but soon enough this will burn out as well.  You remember Mumbai attack. You must have read so many articles about what government should have done, what media should have done etc. you must have heard that particular news which stated that police lacked quality bullet proof jackets which led to the death of many. Are you still updated with what government has done till now. Has police been provided with the quality jackets as of now? I am not sure how many newspapers and media news channels have covered this. The same thing can be said about Olympics as well. Again zillions of articles to improve the sports infrastructure and standard blah blah has been published those days but what has been till now, I am quite sure many of us are not aware and most importantly, not even tried to be aware of. Only when the next time another attack happens (god forbid) or desperate failure at Olympic takes place, we will see those history pages. In a nut shell, we forget. Damn, we forget. Even media stops reporting the same as the news does not generate the same level of TRPs.
Bringing upon the states, cast and religion into this is like a final nail in the coffin. The minute you bring the state/cast/religion, you basically alienate those set of people. It’s just like you are expressing that those people of that respective states, cast etc are kind of people that do these offences. Suddenly, the whole concept of cultural heritage and Unity in Diversity goes for a toss. The amount of energy that those set of people would have utilized for the better good is now being channelled to save their respective cast/state/religion identities. Again, I would like to reiterate that those criminals don’t even belong to the species called Homo Sapience, lest forget any cast, state, religion etc
Last but not the least; our education system is equally responsible. Again turning back the pages of our glorious past, we will see our Indian society has always been male chauvinist. Even Mahabharata and Ramayana were more about Pandavas and Kauravs or probably Arjun, Kans or Ram and Hanuman and less about Draupadi or Sita. We still ask “abbey movie main hero kaun hai” and not heroine. (Unless that movie do involves an explicit hot sex scene). We still favour a son rather than a daughter in our family. These minuscule things create a mind-frame that we BOYS are the centre of attention. However, when we come to the real world, the situation is otherwise. Getting a girl is rather tough job. Not able to accept that, we indulge in these serious crimes.

What to be done now.
Firstly, Vote dullards Vote.
Secondly, girls,
You better be alert. I read those pamphlets stating “don’t ask girls not to wear short skirts but rather ask boys not to rape us”. Well, I asked those boys, they said “NO”. Now, What next? Girls, remember, around 50% of the rapes are being committed by close ones that include your relatives and friends. The set of people you trust. Assuming that Every Rape is a Rape no matter how brutal it is, you better make sure of yourself that you are prepared to handle the same. You can’t change the people around you. Probably for them, even today, Akeli ladki khuli hui tijori ke tarah hoti hai. That much needed change of outlook and mentality will take time and more importantly, a lot of efforts. What you can do is make few changes. At least carry a pepper spray with you every single time no matter with whom and with how many you are going. If you are using a public transport, send the vehicle number to your parents/room-mate/college mate etc. If possible, make sure that the drivers and others around see that you are messaging the number to others. That may dither them from such flagitious act. If you are using smart phones, very well you can use smart app to let people know of your location. If you gonna drink, do the afore-mentioned before you start getting drowsy.
Thirdly, Parents.
One line says it all. Instead of leaving a better tomorrow for kids, you try to leave better kids for tomorrow (someone’s tweet). Get over this “mera beta aisa kabhi nahi kar sakta” attitude. Do ask your son where he is going after 9 pm and enquire when he is away all night, the exact thing you do with your daughters. 
Fourthly, the Boys
 Trust me; just try to spend few hours listening to the eve teasing incidents happened to your sisters, wives, girl friend and other close friends among girls. That will certainly and intensely boil your heart against those doers and probably will kill the rapist inside you if you are one. I know, it’s difficult to discuss and even sounds disturbing but then, amongst us lays the monstrous animals. Also, at least promise to take some sort of initiative to deter any eve teasing taking place around you. One thing which I felt was clearly missing amongst the people around when that girl was lying unconscious on the road after being thrown out of the bus.
In the end note, to a large extent, we, the people are responsible for all these shit. We still blame others and fear to take our responsibilities.
Remember one beautiful quote which I read it somewhere

Umra bhar galib yahi bhool karta raha
dhool chehre par thi aur aaina saaf karta raha..! #society


PS: Happy new year guys, hope your happiness grows like silence of our PM and stupidity of Abhijit Mukherjee  (the dented and painted guy)


Friday, September 28, 2012

The Date

DLF Saket, New Delhi
5 o' Clock, evening
20th September, 2012

I was waiting for her. This time near Big Chill. I was dressed in the best way possible I can and by that I mean neat and clean clothes firmly ironed. I checked, checked, rechecked, and again checked myself in the nearby mirror (of a parked Maruti 800 car) realizing the fact that there is no scope of further improvement. 15 min passed and no trace of her yet. The desperation level reached new high with every passing second. Guys, It’s been over 1.5 years since the last time we met and these days,  I have seen even my phone battery at times, lasted longer than most people relationships, so, you can imagine what I was going through.  

Finally, she arrived. 15 min late. That’s another thing that her past track record suggests that she is at least 15 min before time. Needless to say, she looked beautiful. I mean just a plain violet top and carbon black jeans were sufficient enough to wreck my world. She has a beautiful pair of eyes, her skin has the glow of a peach, her cheeks are like apples and her lips like cherries (am I giving a description of a Fruit Salad???). Trust me guys, if she were a Burger at McDonald's, she would have been named McGorgeous. She looked perfectly in shape, FAIRER and elegant. During a stroll, the song that struck my mind at that point of time was Michael Jackson's Black or White (Me Black, Shez White).
We have decided to watch a movie together. I had options of booking advance tickets of Barfii (IMDB rating 9.0) and THAT’S My Boy (IMDB rating 5.1), Booked 2 corner seat tickets for That’s My Boy. The reason being she may lose the interest in watching the damned movie and we can chit chat during the entire movie.

("Chit chat" u understand rite?) 

So, the movie started and as far as I am concerned, was ultra boring. Within 15 minutes, I realized no sane man can bear the same. On the contrary, she was immersed in the quagmire of that ghastly boring movie. Still, I made a move. I wrapped my hands around her neck and pulled her near to me. She hesitated initially but did not refuse. Considering it a green signal, I went a step ahead tried to give a peck on her cheeks.

 chatttttttaaaaaaakkkk (over my right wrist)

All I can say, if my girl dresses to kill, she also hits the same way.
I remember the sound was so much emphatic that it felt like someone has been slapped right and tight on his face. In that situation, no surprises, for guessing, who is that “someone”. The full house cinema theatre turned and glanced towards me. Some giggled, others laughed. Everyone understood what just happened and on a embarrassment scale of 1-10, I was at fucking 15. The rest of the movies passed without any action (there were few in the movie though). Poor me.

Hard Rock Cafe (HRC)

At 9 we got free. As planned, we went to HRC. These days, what I use to do is whenever I go to say HRC, BBQ etc, I just say to our waiter that I am here for the 1st time and then start their royal service. They treat you with utmost care with zero margin of error. I n her were having a good time there until we decided to have shots. Till then, 2 LIITs already started to knock us down. We had 6 shots altogether.2 hours of complete knock out experience.

And then the bill arrived; the worst part of any date. I knew we have drunk a lot. Way above our standards. I remember when I was looking up the bill; I felt I am opening up the checked answer copy of an exam that I have badly totally deeply screwed. And yes, the bill was way above what I expected, unlike in case of marks which is generally the other way around. The bill came around 5.5K. She looked at me. I looked at her. And then we both knew whoz gonna pay the bill.

Why me?

Simple answer: I am a BOY

No doubt, Date went more than perfect except that my balance sheet was no more balanced, continuous cash outflows has shook the very foundation of the same. Income statement was more of an Expense statement. The word Profit in the Profit n Loss Account seems redundant. Though the NPV (Net Present Value), as per the present economic condition of this relationship, financially seemed to be negative but deep inside I knew, there are few things that money can’t buy. The one smile worth dying for, the one hug worth living for, the one “I love u too” worth remembering, the one hangover worth forgetting encapsulate a sequel of experiences I can’t just stop envisioning.

Time of my Life...

PS: Hope my dad is not reading this as all the Balance Sheet, Income statement, PnL account I am talking about belongs to him.

Monday, January 9, 2012

EXAMS: AN INSIGHT

Guys, I just had my end semester for the second tri-semester here at IMT Ghaziabad, a B-school in India. All I can say that whosoever has told you that life in a B-school in damn hectic has completely misguided you. Trust me; if you have pledged yourself not to learn anything, you are going to do fine.
MBA TIMELINE
(How the meaning of MBA changes with time)
2days before joining college
MBA: Main Banunga Ambani
1 month after you join
MBA: Masti with Babes and Alcohol
After 6 months i.e. present scenario (just after the end semesters)
MBA: Main Bekaar Aadmi
FYI: This post is about my experience of last end-semester examination here.
PPS: just click on the graphs/pic to enhance its clarity.

BEFORE EXAM
2 days before exam, when you ask in private Facebook page of your section about the portion of the exam, this is what you get



1 day before when someone asks a doubt



DURING EXAM



IF A HOT GIRL IS SITTING AROUND





IF SHE IS WEARING MINIs





WHILE ANSWERING MULTIPLE ANSWER QUESTIONS, SAY YOU HAVE TICKED OPTION “C” AND YOU GET A CHANCE TO PEEK A VIEW OF THE FRONT BENCHER




DURING A THEORY (SUBJECTIVE) PAPER, WHAT FACTORS YOU CONSIDER WHILE ANSWERING



AFTER EXAM
BEFORE EXAM WHAT YOU PLANNED TO DO AFTER EXAM



WHAT YOU REALLY DO



ABOUT YOUR QUITTING CIGARETTE RESOLUTION AFTER EXAMS



Those rare occasions, when you prepared hard for an exam AND just before the exam you are expecting that you gonna rock back this paper
This is actually what happens




In a nutshell, my story says that what you prepare for a paper is completely different from what you write in the paper and finally, what results come are even more variant. As far as I am concerned, exam does the same thing to me what Kalmadi, Raja and Kanimozhi has done to this country.
PS: yaa, you are right, I am on high

Saturday, November 26, 2011

A Classic Incident

September '97
School days

We use to have "unit" tests every 2 months of 1 hour each worth 25 marks per subject during our school days . The test was conducted at our class rooms only and on that particular day, I was sitting with my topper, who was just a hi-bye-go die kinda friend of mine.

Maths it was. Exam started,paper was kinda easy and within 40 minutes I solved everything. Thereafter, I saw my topper,he had also completed everything except the last Qs which he was in the process to solve. 5 minutes later, I saw him again, still trying his level best to unriddle the same. I gestured that I can help but he denied. 5 minutes later, I observed him again and this time, he was sweating like hell. The quagmire of last question was slowly killing him like a colchicine mixed with apple juice. The click of every second passing by was like the sound of his coffin being nailed 6 feet under the ground.
I have always felt that for toppers, marks are binary, its either full(=1) or, if not full, its equivalent to zero.

He, still, unable to solve, deep inside knew that he can't solve it anymore, adding to his misery, was the fact that a dumb witted moron(that's me) has solved it.

3 min left and ahoy! this boy finally gave up and "literally" pleaded "vineet, please show me how u did it"
I smiled(= I won): I sneaked the test copy towards him and within next 2 minutes, he copied everything.
Paper got over.We submitted the answer copy after which i expected at least a heartfelt thanks or even a comforting smile but all this guy managed was a cold stern glare.
WHO CARES, I was glad with my performance and didn't bother much about that.

1 week later,test answer copy was distributed and i got 23 out of 25. My topper got 25/25 and gosh, so happy he was.
I was happy with my 23, a guy who has been sitting for whole of his life in the 3rd last bench sleeping( and sometimes even murmuring in the sleep), for him, anything beyond 18 is a bonus.

Lunch Time
I was chit chatting with a group of 7-8 friends along with the "topper" in that circle when someone asked me " hey Vineet, how much you got in Maths yaar"
I (with a proud smile and virtually patting my back): dude, 23
AND THEN CAME THE REPLY WHICH I AM NEVER GONNA FORGET TILL THE LAST STAR FALLS

he said " haan saale, topper ke saath baitha tha naa"

I was like WHATTTTTTTTTTT
It felt like someone has given me a head-shot with a sniper from a small range.
I looked at my topper and holyshit!!can u believe it, he was looking at the floor,smiling sheepishly with a " ohh come on, no big deal for me" look.

I, mum, was glaring at him,eyes wide opened, waiting desperately for him to clarify but then his ego never let him do the same. That son of a bitch never told anyone that his fucking 25 was because of a 3rd last row guy.

PS: I almost gave up cheating after that.
PPS: but then i needed my 23, and as i grew old, that 23 even out of 50 seemed like skydiving without ropes.
PPPS: these days, Back on track.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

rakhi special !

Case Study: I and My Sister

Title: 36 ka aankra

Case topic: The pros and cons of having a younger sister.

Content

· My sister: an overview

· Issues we have

· My sister’s skillset

· Biased role of parents

· Citing Incidents for proof (I)

· The other side

· Citing incidents for proof (II)

· Conclusion


My sister

My sister is 5 years younger to me. Being the youngest member, she is the one who make rules, break rules and amend the same as per her requirement. Her sweet, cute, adorable face and fake tears are the best ominous weapon she possesses with perfect skill to use the same with precise alacrity.

Issues we have:

To be frank, other than sharing the same set of parents, we hardly share anything else or have anything in common.If I and my sister are talking, it barely takes 10 min for turmoil to start. Thanks to our Brobdingnagian creativity that we always come up with new topic to fight. Trust me, even in selecting a topic to fight, we can have a fight. Now, I am gonna throw some light on the topics we have quarrelled:

· Who will sit in the front seat of the car?

· Who will take the window seat in the train?

· Who will take the new double-rack Mickey Mouse pencil box to school which I (note this) have seen first and purchased from the market?

· Why it’s always butter scotch flavour and not chocolate flavour ice cream that is brought in at home?

· She loves brinjal curry and I love lady’s finger. No point in guessing what is cooked more regularly.

· Why Pok√©mon on TV (and these days, Inuyasha (some Japanese shit which my timid brain failed to comprehend) and not Live cricket?

· Last point repeated…WHYYYYYYYYYY?

Sometimes, I just feel we have more number of issues than probably, India and Pakistan have.


My sister's Skill set:

“Good lord, save the world”

Blackmailing skills: If ever, there were a noble prize in blackmailing; my sister would have been winning it for last 20 years undisputedly. She has such a photographic memory that whenever she wants something from me which I am not accepting, she will just open the account book of my life, would pick up one unfavourable ghastly mistake that I did before (say even a decade back)and the next moment, she will pretend to stomp towards Dad mumbling that today she gonna reveal everything. Next scene: Her foot, my faceL

Remember, I got one New Year greeting card from one girl (who was not even my girlfriend) which my sis, somehow, discovered. The next thing I remember is for the next 2-3 weeks she made me do all her maths and science homework and along with that she compelled me to watch all those stupid animes with her. Condition applied: she won’t tell it to mom.

Acting Skills: I bet 20 on 10. Whenever she is losing any argument (very rare event indeed, you have better chances of seeing Haley’s comet than to see my sister loosing), she will gradually drag the venue of fight near to the place where my mom is sitting and henceforth either of the two under-mentioned casemay ensue

1. Suddenly, within a minute, she may start crying with REAL tears.

2. She somehow brings me inside the hullaballoo as a result of which the whole focus is shifted to me.

In either case, it’s Game Over for me. My mom will lambast me thereafter while my sister in the back ground continues winking at me.

One incident I would like to quote

Once, I complained my mom that Sis always compels me to do her homework. My mom thereafter started berating her. After couple of minutes,

My sis (with teary-weary eyes): you always scold me for minute things but never to bhaiya no matter what he does.

Mom: what did bhaiya do?

Sis: I don’t know, ask him only to whom he was talking to last night at 2, you won’t censure him for this but if I ask him to do my homework once in a blue moon(make it 5 days a week), I will be criticized like I am the one responsible for 9-11…..

Within a fraction of second, the focal point shifts and ultimately, I am the one over which the sinister flash light is now aimed. Needless to mention, next half an hour gets wasted in convincing, pleading and begging my mom that nothing like this happened.

Biased role of parents: it’s an unwritten law. Parents always take the side of the youngest; here I will cite some of the incidents that will stamp the afore-mentioned belief. · Whenever I am returning from college, I use to call my dad and ask “are you coming to station to pick me up?” Dad simply replies” why?? can’t you come alone, you are grown up now, manage yourself L, when my sister is returning from her college, she use to call dad and ORDERS “Dad, don’t you dare bring a Non-AC car to pick me up” and dad just replies “ sure beta sure”

· When I asked my dad for a laptop, I almost gave a power point presentation on the topic “why I need a lappy” giving instances of the usage of Wikipedia, e-books, software etc. In case of my sis, she just said that she can’t ask for her roommate’s laptop (in college) again and again whenever she wants to watch a movie. Within 3 days, she had one as compared to 1.5 months in my case.

· I got “4 in 1” video game cassette (remember those days??) that had games like “Aladdin” and “Jungle Book” in it after I scored 98 in maths in 10th board exams. My sister got a Sony Hi-Fi after she got 90 in the same.

· Whenever we are having an argument, my dad will support my sister, henceforth, she eventually wins. Trust me, I have lost even a debate “who is more important, School Principal or Prime Minister” even though I supported Prime Minister.

THE OTHER SIDE: the beautiful side. I guess I have to accept the fact that it was complete fun growing up with her.She is sweet, adorable and everyone in my family loves her. She knows she enjoys some extra privilege and some extra freedom from my parents but deep inside I knowif I would have been in the place of my parents, I would have done the same. She is so cute that you just can’t see her sad and will do anything that could bring a smile on her face. She lightens everyone’s mood no matter what we are going through. Her foolish mistakes, stupid talks and lamest excuses can make you burst in laughter.

And most importantly, she is a wonderful sis. Following are few set of incidents that I will cite once again (To readers, please hold your patience; it’s almost the last paragraph).

· Many times, she signed my report card, thanks to her incredible talent of replicating my dad’s signature.

· She would happily and elegantly draw all the diagrams in my bio practical notebook without any fuss.

· She helped me memorize all the answers of history, civics, geography (and even maths and science) during board exams.

· She made tea for me million times at mid night whenever I ask for.

· Loved the way she convinced dad that why I should have a laptop, repeated the same when I needed a Digicam.

· Whenever sweets are distributed in her school, she will bring few for me for sure.

Conclusion:

I guess if I continue penning down every incident, I may end up writing till eternity. All I can say, loosing against her every single time was something that enthralled me. I feel amazed the way she acclimatizes to new place and then never complaining about the changes. I loved the way her small eyes twinkle when she gets what she is looking for. I feel honoured the way she started to understand her responsibilities much before I did.

In a nutshell,tedhi hai magar meri hai!Happy Rakhi sis and we still have got lot many memories to build and cherish.

PS: sis, the fight is still on

PPS: almost left blogging these daysL, paucity of time is to be blamed

Monday, May 9, 2011

Letter to God's Meteorological Department

Add Image

To

The God

Head of Department

Weather Wing, Chennai zone

CC

The chairGOD

Lord of all wings

Kailash Parbat

Time: 12:30 pm IST

Dear God

Subject: Chennai Weather

I know you must be completely occupied with your December, 2012 plans but meanwhile, with due regards, I would sheepishly like to draw your attention towards the dismal weather scenario in Chennai. Its 2nd week of May and temperature is already soaring up to 44C. Sometimes, it feels that Equator’s epicenter is this place only and we are inside some kind of an unregulated oven. Humidity, BEWARE. Freaking 80%. It takes 20 minutes for the weather here to expose the brand of my baniyan (vests) I am wearing inside. Not only this, I have been sweating so badly that in the last few days I have tasted every salt my body has produced through the sweat and trust me it’s not NaCl(common salt), it taste way weird. About body odour, dude worst!!!! Guess what, if odour were visible, as color is, I'd see the summer garden in rainbow clouds.

God, as per my class 2nd Gulmohar books, there are 4 seasons. (World Meteorological Department later confirmed me as well) But it seems like you have completely forgotten about winter. About spring, don’t you even ask. People have even stopped expecting it here. Probably, the next generations of Chennai won’t even have the description of spring in their school-curriculum. Not fair god. It’s just summer and dreadful eternal summer here. And YOU MR. SIDNEY SHELDON, Nothing Last Forever, HUH, my foot. God, I am not accusing you but literally I feel that the sub ordinates to whom you have given the in charge of Chennai zone are perhaps busy listening to Radio Mirchi 98.3 FM, “its hot” without realizing the fact that Chennai is turning way hotter.

Trust me god, the constant sweating while watching cricket matches (IPL season 4 these days) is exceptionally irritating. You just imagine how you will feel when this same sweating annoys you while you are watching the classy dance of Urvashi and other apsaras.

Dear god, I don’t want to hurt your sentiments. In fact, I am a big follower of yours. I appreciate the way you designed the whole Darwinian thing to take place cell by call, gene by gene, one by one. You also made dinosaurs to extinct which I personally feel that you did the right thing. Do same with the cockroaches. Least to mention, you made India win the WC and I know deep inside that when that winning six was struck, it was not Dhoni, it was you.(okk fine, enough of buttering).

But god, please please pleases, for god’s sake, take Chennai seriously. After all, it’s a metropolitan (according to article 738:1939). Till today, DOORDARSHAN includes Chennai while telling the chaar mahanagron ka taapmaan during National NEWS, then why don’t you include it in your priority list. God please don’t concentrate all the UVs of India over us only. Distribute to Bangalore and Pune as well.

Awaiting immediate response

Truly yours (except in May)

Vineet Singh

Resident, Chennai

PS: That’s it, confirmed, I will go to hell. L

Friday, February 11, 2011

(SIN)gle


Draped in cerulean colored jersey and carbon black denim, I checked myself again in front of the mirror for one last time. Rating myself 20 on 10, I eventually geared myself up to meet princess of fairyland Avantika, my valentine

It’s been over10 minutes that I have been waiting for her near plaza with a bunch of red roses, a “U R THE ONLY ONE FOR ME” card and few Bournville chocolates. It’s been the 10 minutes of sheer excitement and desperation with lot of things going across my mind (typical guy I am, u can easily guess what was going through).

Anyways, she finally arrived and did I mention how gorgeous she looked. She was wearing those ultra seductive red mini (probably micro) skirts with her hairs flowing in tandem with each of her steps. She reminded me of those classic khajuraho sculpture that, atleast in my mind, is profoundly engraved.

She came closer to me, said, Happy Valentine’s Day baby and brushed a kiss through my cheeks. Thereafter I took her to one of the coziest (and costliest) of the restaurants to have our candle light dinner.....

blah blah blah blah

Yeaahh u got it, its never been my story but yupps, that has been the story I have watching a lot around, sometimes it’s so frustrating to see this that I feel like joining Bajrang Dal or Shivsena and then do all those patak patak kar pitaai to all those new bees

Well my story is like yours. I am single and probably romantically challenged. My story has been of a guy who is standing in the platform of a big railway station where lot many trains arrive and go. Though I am quite choosy about the peculiar train I am looking for, I must say whenever I choose a train that train always gives me a waitlisted status which never gets confirm in due course of time. Sometimes there have been circumstances when I just felt that this time it may get confirm, but then suddenly in the last moment some guy with VIP quota grabs my seat. Worst is the Taltkal ticket holders, who come to the station the very last moment, make extra investments that you can’t afford and then swipe your seat just below your feet.

However, being single is not that bad. Whenever I see a new train coming, more elegant and blissful, I feel glad that I didn’t take the last train. I mean there is no point in catching the train that passes through few stations and then cease to move. Adding to that, it feels good that still, all the trains are equally available to me. Needless to mention, these days passengers and trains are changing each other so frequently that you just don’t know that when you are going to hit the jackpot.

But since this is valentine and my train is like super late (probably derailed), I have decided that I am gonna check out all the trains that are coming across. I will also fix my eyes on following facts

1. Which passenger got which train
2. Which train is carrying more than 1 passenger at one time with both the passengers unaware of each other
3. Which passengers have more than one confirmed seat and which seat they finally take?

PS: what a crap
PPS: This valentine I will like to convey the same message that I tried to convey last
Holi and Diwali...PLAY SAFE