Sunday, November 1, 2009

Class assignment(by the Seniors)

Room no. 604
8:50 a.m.
I arrived at the class 1O minutes before in order to grab the last bench so as to complete the 2000 word horrendous assignment given by our senior on a mind-blowing topic " AN AFFAIR WITH AN ANT".The last bench was already occupied by a couple of Maharashtra guys.

Me:Dude,can you give me your seat,I need to complete the assignment.
That guy just flashed his folder sheets in the air over which his topic was written
"Why Parle G and not Parle F"
3000 words
His teary weary eyes truly expressed that he can't write 3000 words about himself..where came this Parle A,B,C,D thing.I expressed my heartfelt sympathy to him like a co-prisoner who is locked up in the same jail.

So, I started writing.Asked for an internet appareled mobile from a friend.Googled the topic and whatever I found...All I can say is that if you are below 18,don't try this thing out.

30 minutes later, I was fully exhausted.Mind clogged.My condition was like a guy who is sitting in his toilet trying hard to Shit,then also ending up with nothing.Guys,truly speaking,writing 2000 words on that silly topic felt like counting 2000 stars in daytime.I was so enervated that once, even I started listening to the chemistry's professor's crap.

After 30 seconds of my traumatic concentration,I turned my head towards my bench-mate.Rolling the pen between his finger,fully captivated in the class, he was noting even the minute details of the Cannizzaro reaction is his king-size notebook as if he has to prepare a national railway budget for the next fiscal year from all those details.An ideal Complan boy I guess.

I started writing again(crap).I tried to wrote a sensual portrayal of the ant.Something like this...
Wearing a tight pink colored T-shirt outfitted with 6-legged blue Calvin Klein torn jeans escorted with a long silky hair(0.2mm),she looked like an angel from heaven(yeeaahhh...the Negro version).Her microscopic hazel eyes when affixed with me, I immediately knew she was the ONE for me.My heart started pounding hard and her delicate antennae blissfully fitted on her head displayed the frequency as 121 beats/second.Holy Mackeral!!!she was implausibly ravishing.Probably James Blunt has sung the song "You are beautiful" remembering that gorgeous babe only.

Thereafter, I wrote "something something" which was completely bullshit just like the last paragraph.Even then,2000 words was a gargantuan task.So, I stopped pestering my timid brain.I took out of The Times of India newspaper which we generally use to bring in the class for time-pass.Some spicy news of Britney Spears and Kevin Federline love mishap was making the top stories.I copied the whole report just replacing Britney's name with her and Kevin's with me.

Around 5 p.m. in the evening, I submitted the uncanny report to one of my most chilled senior.My goodness, he started reading it with 110% concentration word after word as if it's an end-semester's leaked question paper.I shivered as they have strictly mentioned not to copy from any external sources.After around 15 minutes of absolute silence,he said
"well done boy,Good work!"
I relaxed(72 beats/second)now.Felt like a cold-blooded criminal has been denied of all charges and has been declared innocent.Before I can feel the feelings anymore,that senior(walking away with a guileful smile)said
"By the way,Britney and Kevin are having a good time now.Hope you too have a good time tonight at the 5th block terrace at 11p.m....SHARP.

SHIT SHITT SHITTT




13 comments:

Pratik said...

nice post

murthy_thehandsome(?) said...

Hey dude nice one infact great goin... i liked the portion in which u described the ant wearing jeans n all, the silky hair one .... was laughing properly when i was goin through those portions... good goin bro..

Ravsss said...

yah bhai ... awesome work

√♪נ汉Ψ said...

reallly nice work..........

Keep penning.

Seniors always love junors like you who done their job so efficiently...



http://scribedbyme.blogspot.com/

RON ... said...

impressive man, the english even more!!!
had been a long time since i thoroughly went thru ur blog...

try ur hand at GRE soon.... or atleast CAT...

vedicanbest said...

why parle g not parle f.....'coz glocond starts with g not with f....hehheheeee.....cool post buddy.

Karthik said...

These things are just getting better and better, man. Seniors can be a pain in the neck sometimes! Phew!:P
But you always seem to be having a way to outsmart them. Great!
Wonderful post again!

vamsi said...

nice work dude..it was very hilarious..Pray to god that ur seniors wont read ur post..hehehe..:)

pradeep said...

good work

Raghu V N said...

I wonder how you can maintain a stability in your standard of humour. great!

angel from heaven said...

I loved the description of the ant in clothing.
started writing again(crap).I tried to wrote a sensual portrayal of the ant.Something like this...
Wearing a tight pink colored T-shirt outfitted with 6-legged blue Calvin Klein torn jeans escorted with a long silky hair(0.2mm),she looked like an angel from heaven(yeeaahhh...the Negro version).Her microscopic hazel eyes when affixed with me, I immediately knew she was the ONE for me.My heart started pounding hard and her delicate antennae blissfully fitted on her head displayed the frequency as 121 beats/second.Holy Mackeral!!!she was implausibly ravishing.Probably James Blunt has sung the song "You are beautiful" remembering that gorgeous babe only.

awesome.

Mani Lalwani said...

Well, I just realized this, as to what connects all the institutes acrosss the country !
Maybe, its the ragging we undergo and the "tareeke used to check aur funde"

I remember being given the topic "jab mujhe apni zindagi ka pehla jhappad padha" or being sophisticated "when I lost me SLAPoginity" I had to describe the feelings for 10 minutes.. And, rest assured, I can say that those 10 minutes were the longest time of my life till now :)

vineet said...

me too, speaking my wrds. really